Who would win in a fight to the death, with both men at their prime physical conditions, respectively - Abraham Lincoln or John F. Kennedy?
The fight of the millenium? Mayhaps.I'm serious. Yeah, Lincoln has the reach, but I really want to know who would completely slaughter the other person. Kennedy was pretty ripped, if memory serves, and Lincoln wasn't anything to scoff at, either. Both men had super-hot wives... right? I feel like a guy as awesome as Abraham Lincoln must have had his pick of the litter, right? Maybe not. Actually, now that I think of it, I remember hearing that his wife was merely average.
Place of Birth:
Abraham "Slavery Killa" Lincoln - near Hodgenville, Kentucky, United States
J "Lady Killa" FK - Brookline, Massachusetts, United States
Height:
Lincoln - 6 feet, 3 and three-quarter inches (1.92m)
JFK - 6 feet, even (1.83m)
Occupations Prior to Becoming President:
Lincoln - Lawyer, Saloon owner, Steamboat Pilot (all of which are awesome until you remember that James Buchanan was a friggin' PRIZEFIGHTER before he was President)
JFK - Writer
Religion:
Lincoln - Deist, although there is some controversy about whether or not he converted to Protestant Christianity prior to his death.
JFK - Roman Catholic
Children Birthed:
Lincoln - 4, all by Mary Ann Todd Lincoln; Robert Todd Lincoln, Edward Baker "Eddie" Lincoln, William Wallace "Willie" Lincoln, Thomas "Tad" Lincoln.
JFK - JFK actually had terrible luck birthing children. One, to be named Arabella, was stillborn. Another, Patrick Bouvier Kennedy, only survived two days before succumbing to a respiratory disease. John Fitzgerald Kennedy, Jr. lived for nearly 39 years before dying in a plane crash. Caroline Bouvier Kennedy Schlossberg is the only surviving Kennedy child.
Military Service:
Lincoln - Captain, Illinois Militia, Black Hawk War (BAD ASS!)
JFK - Lieutenant, United States Navy, World War II (BAD ASS!, but less so)
Education:
Lincoln - Became a lawyer after independent study; never attended law school.
JFK - London School of Economics; transferred to Princeton University; transferred to Harvard, graduated; attended Stanford Graduate School of business, but didn't graduate.
Pets Owned:
Lincoln - Nanny and Nanko, goats; Jack, turkey; Fido, dog; Horse, horse.
JFK - Charlie, Welsh Terrier; Tom Kitten, cat; Robin, canary; Bluebelle and Marybelle, parakeets; Macaroni, Tex, and Leprechaun, ponies; Debbie and Billie, hamsters; Pushinka, mutt; Shannon, Irish Cocker Spaniel; Wolf, mutt; Butterfly, White Tips, Blackie, and Streaker, all offspring of Pushinka and Charlie; Zsa Zsa, rabbit; Sardar, horse.
Thwarted Assassination Attempts:
Lincoln - None. He totally died the first go-around.
JFK - 1. Richard Paul Pavlick, a 73 year-old former postal worker, planned to drive a dynamite-strapped 1950 Buick into Kennedy's vehicle but decided not to when he saw JFK bidding his wife and daughter goodbye.
Age at Death:
Lincoln - 56 years, 62 days (20,516 days)
JFK - 46 years, 117 days (16,978 days)
I dunno, guys. This one is really up in the air. I mean, on the one hand Lincoln owned his own saloon, piloted a steamboat, had four kids, was a self-taught lawyer, was born God-knows-where, and was way tall. On the other hand, however, Kennedy had a soul of stone by the time his kids all died, and had about a thousand times more pets than Abe. Really, I don't know.
Also, in case anybody was confused, this hypothetical death match would be weaponless, no shoes, shirts, or belts, and in the crater of an almost-erupting volcano.
LET'S GET READY TO RUMMMBLLLLLLE!!!
Place of Birth:
Abraham "Slavery Killa" Lincoln - near Hodgenville, Kentucky, United States
J "Lady Killa" FK - Brookline, Massachusetts, United States
Height:
Lincoln - 6 feet, 3 and three-quarter inches (1.92m)
JFK - 6 feet, even (1.83m)
Occupations Prior to Becoming President:
Lincoln - Lawyer, Saloon owner, Steamboat Pilot (all of which are awesome until you remember that James Buchanan was a friggin' PRIZEFIGHTER before he was President)
JFK - Writer
Religion:
Lincoln - Deist, although there is some controversy about whether or not he converted to Protestant Christianity prior to his death.
JFK - Roman Catholic
Children Birthed:
Lincoln - 4, all by Mary Ann Todd Lincoln; Robert Todd Lincoln, Edward Baker "Eddie" Lincoln, William Wallace "Willie" Lincoln, Thomas "Tad" Lincoln.
JFK - JFK actually had terrible luck birthing children. One, to be named Arabella, was stillborn. Another, Patrick Bouvier Kennedy, only survived two days before succumbing to a respiratory disease. John Fitzgerald Kennedy, Jr. lived for nearly 39 years before dying in a plane crash. Caroline Bouvier Kennedy Schlossberg is the only surviving Kennedy child.
Military Service:
Lincoln - Captain, Illinois Militia, Black Hawk War (BAD ASS!)
JFK - Lieutenant, United States Navy, World War II (BAD ASS!, but less so)
Education:
Lincoln - Became a lawyer after independent study; never attended law school.
JFK - London School of Economics; transferred to Princeton University; transferred to Harvard, graduated; attended Stanford Graduate School of business, but didn't graduate.
Pets Owned:
Lincoln - Nanny and Nanko, goats; Jack, turkey; Fido, dog; Horse, horse.
JFK - Charlie, Welsh Terrier; Tom Kitten, cat; Robin, canary; Bluebelle and Marybelle, parakeets; Macaroni, Tex, and Leprechaun, ponies; Debbie and Billie, hamsters; Pushinka, mutt; Shannon, Irish Cocker Spaniel; Wolf, mutt; Butterfly, White Tips, Blackie, and Streaker, all offspring of Pushinka and Charlie; Zsa Zsa, rabbit; Sardar, horse.
Thwarted Assassination Attempts:
Lincoln - None. He totally died the first go-around.
JFK - 1. Richard Paul Pavlick, a 73 year-old former postal worker, planned to drive a dynamite-strapped 1950 Buick into Kennedy's vehicle but decided not to when he saw JFK bidding his wife and daughter goodbye.
Age at Death:
Lincoln - 56 years, 62 days (20,516 days)
JFK - 46 years, 117 days (16,978 days)
I dunno, guys. This one is really up in the air. I mean, on the one hand Lincoln owned his own saloon, piloted a steamboat, had four kids, was a self-taught lawyer, was born God-knows-where, and was way tall. On the other hand, however, Kennedy had a soul of stone by the time his kids all died, and had about a thousand times more pets than Abe. Really, I don't know.
Also, in case anybody was confused, this hypothetical death match would be weaponless, no shoes, shirts, or belts, and in the crater of an almost-erupting volcano.
LET'S GET READY TO RUMMMBLLLLLLE!!!
1 Comment:
you are not good at updating.
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